Ok so two events happened today that wanted to make me hand out a “Slow Award” as in: You so slow, you get a cookie for effort.

Incident #1: My coworker just for being. It’s not like they are mean or anything, it’s just you know they are slooooowwwwwww. I looked into their eyes and they had vacancy signs posted.

Slow award goes to: brain not in, check back…never.

Incident #2: Ok, so I walk into work this morning and immediately a coworker who had not met me asked ” Hi, how may I help you” because she assumed I was some random student. I thought nothing of it and pointed to my table and told her I what I was there to work on. She said ‘ok’.

Then I noticed that my boss had left some papers for me to whole punch, so I sauntered on back to the workroom. The chick got really defensive and was like “can I help you with something?”. In my mind I was like “down bessie”. But I smiled and said “no I just need to get to the whole puncher”. She was like well “blah blah blah”…I honestly can’t remember because at the EXACT same time my brain registered the fact that she didn’t know I worked there.

So in a nice but forecful manner I said “I work here”. I ain’t neva seen somebody backpedal so fast! It was hilarious! As she was trying to get her foot out of her mouth, I told her it was fine. She really did have a look of ‘Oh my God, don’t let this big black lady with a fro beat me down cause I didn’t know she worked here and got all territorial!”

Ya’ll, sumthin rose up in me! lol. I know she felt me attack once my brain registered what was going on. I felt the heat rise up off my own skin. Lawd. Ya see I’m working with a collection of music taped during the late 40’s on into the 60’s and I’ve run into alot of racist material. Jeebus be my guide! To escalate matters, I work with all white people! I don’t wanna see a white person after I done listened to that mess! Also, I watched some Boondocks, the day before yesterday AND the afro forces are in full effect. Lord protect the white people, for they know not what they have hired! lol

Slow award goes to: white girl in grey clothing.

Moving on…

Incident #3: Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo I thought I’d grab some Baked Cheetos because I liked the ones I tried at my uncles house during Thanksgiving. I rolled down the snack isle at Wal-merrrr…let that marinate….and snatched up a bag, thinking I was doing the healthy alternative. So I noticed that my tongue was kinda blueish/purpleish. I didn’t think anything of it cause I DID just make some purple koolaid. So I shook it off. Then I noticed that it was more pronounced the next day but again I shrugged it off because I’d bought some spearmint gum and that was kinda greenish bluish and that could be the culprit. Really, I was like “what the…am I getting sick!” So, today I didn’t eat any of the above suspects because I don’t like having a blue tongue and lips…just think about that blue blow pop we used to eat….not cool. I get a lil freaked because I haven’t eaten any of the suspects and my tounge is still blue. So I hop up and head to the sink for an experiment. I took my butterscoth life savor, which i have been eating today and my cheeto and put them in water. Voila! My Cheeto turned blue! I was like hmmmm, am I a victim of some kind of terrorist action! lol Yes, I went there!

Having lost my appetite, I finished up my apple sauce and called it a day. I get home and jump on the messanger, telling my cousin about my findings. I swore to her that i’d never eat them again! Tryin to be healthy and i still get skrewed! lol

Well sumthin told me to look at the bag again. I was mainly lookin for the comments phone number. I flipped the bag over and there in plain sight..

Turn Thy Tongue Shrek Green

*blink blink*

Deese summummabishes had me thinking I’m dying and they promoting Shrek 3! They need to go somewhere with that mess!

Slow award goes to: *drumroll* ME! Cause I didn’t read…think I set the race back 400 yrs!

Serenity